Your job sucks, my job sucks, we all suck.

Many of you already know my distaste for working at Turkey Hill. Most of you may be familiar with Turkey Hill ice cream and/or iced tea, but many outside of north eastern Pennsylvania don't realize that Turkey Hill is also a chain of convenience stores, owned by Kroger Corporation. There are currently 301 Turkey Hill Minit Markets in operation across eastern Pennsylvania.

Anyway, to get to the body of my discussion, as most of you know I loath working for Turkey Hill. I've always gone home for Christmas break and worked as much as possible, nor have I ever gone anywhere for spring break. Just to good ol' Turkey Hill. My summers are filled with countless mind-numbing hours at various stores. I do it because I need the money for school, obviously. Also, it gets quite expensive when you have a girlfriend. (Currently single, but when I was at PSU and a certain someone would come down and visit me for the weekends it got pretty damn expensive.)
The irony of this is that I'm a sought after employee. I've worked up the ranks to assistant manager, which is odd considering that I'm not there consistently. As stated previously, I'll be there for summers, Christmas breaks, and spring breaks, but no other time. I just happen to be very good at my crappy, pathetic job. When I am coming home for breaks, I don't just work at one store. On average I work at 3 or 4 (depending on the length of the break). Managers take their vacations when they know I'm coming home because they are fully confident I can run their store for them.... which I do.

However, when I work sporadically at different stores customers come in and assume that I'm a new employee. They try to fuck with me on purpose too, saying that the prices aren't what they are listed as, or saying they paid with a $20 when it was actually a $10. Listen buddy, in five years my drawer has been short once... and even that was only two bucks.
I also hate my job because its the worst for meeting girls. You might say, "Ross, but you come into contact with at least a thousand people a day.... a few of which have to be hot girls." And I'd respond with, "Yes, you are correct." However, you can't have a flirty conversation with any of them because there are people behind her waiting to pay for their things and leave. Or old disabled people waiting for their lottery. (One day they are going to have a drive-through lottery window at convenience stores.... I know it.) I can give the cute girl a smile, and they smile back.... but that is as far as it goes. Sometimes they will come back late at night when its slow, but thats only during a weekday. If its Friday or Saturday night forget it.

Another point of interest. First off, let me state this. I will never make fun of anyone for being on assisted living (food stamps for instance). I realize that sometimes times get a little rough and if you had a decent job and were laid off, its not like you want to work at McDonalds unless absolutely desperate. That being said though, I get seriously pissed off when people try to buy cigarettes with their Access card (electronic food stamps card). They tell me to just ring it up as a grocery sale instead of a tobacco sale. They say that other employees do it for them sometimes. Well guess what. I'm not other employees. I'm not busting my hump working and paying taxes so you can buy a pack of smokes on my buck. Buy your kid a candybar instead dammit.

Now we come to the Pennsylvania Lottery *graon*.
People come in and think that I'll mess up their lottery. You know, being a "new" employee and all. I assure them that I can type as fast as they can talk and am very familiar with the lottery machine, so fire away. They look at me for a second with a twinkle of distrust in their eyes, but nonetheless proceed to give me their numbers.

(I'm getting to a point, I promise.)
After a while the regular customers will begin to recognize me. I will leave to go back to school for the semester, then return for winter break. A lot of the older people, who have nothing better to do with their lives I assume, come into the store solely to buy lottery tickets every day. (They will make two or three trips for bread and milk.... lottery is always separate.) Instead of asking me how I am or how school is going, they talk about themselves, the lottery, their grandkids, whatever. Ok, here are a few things I'd like to point out and hopefully word spreads:

* I don't care about what condition your body is in and how long you were in the hospital since last I saw you. Stop eating McDonalds for every meal of the day and you just might avoid that next bypass surgery.

* I don't care how cute your kids and/or grandkids are. I'm 22 years old. Do you think I care about your kids at my age?

* Listen, I just work here. I don't make the prices. And if it says two for $5, then no, you can't have one for $2.50. Thats why its called a promotion people.

* Stop bitching about the price of cigarettes to me. Once again, I just work here. I don't make up the prices. If they are that expensive to you, stop smoking. I did.

* I don't care how you played the daily number one night and 8-3-7 came in and you played 3-7-8 straight and if the number had just come in your way you would have won X amount of dollars. Listen, buddy.... go home, cut your mullet, get a job, and stop spending your welfare check on the lottery.

In closing.... stay in school because you don't want to do this for the rest of your life.
(I should have worked at Victoria's Secret. )